So over the past week I've been pretty emotional. Javier left on Sunday for Denmark and I felt like I slid into a slight nervous breakdown. I had been to a baby shower on Saturday for a girl who is due one day after me. This was her third baby shower (her family is all in town) and she is "all set". Uh, if you walked into our home you would find VERY little evidence that we are due to have a baby in 13 weeks! You'd see some books and that's about it. No nursery, no baby gear, nothing. On Sunday I was simply feeling so unprepared! And it's also overwhelming. I know I know everyone says, "don't worry, you don't need much," but the reality is I DO NEED stuff. Such as a car seat, a stroller, a place for the baby to sleep, blankets, clothes ... just STUFF that will make me feel more READY. It's important. When one begins to look at the cost of all these items things get overwhelming again. Everything is outrageously expensive and you know it will only be used for a short period of time. Shop used, you might say ... well turns out that takes a lot more time and energy for an already super busy person than just buying new ;-).
Thank goodness for my good friend, Devon! She is the mother of a 20-month old and an infinite source of resources and wisdom for me. She has passed down so many maternity clothes to me for which I am immensely grateful. I have purchased near nothing. She is throwing me a baby shower on Oct 11th. AND on Tuesday night she helped me create a baby registry (and made me a birthday dinner).
Even though I have a lot of fabulous friends here, I still feel a little lonely. This is really a time when you need your family around I think. I'm realizing how BIG this really is, having a baby, that is.
I remember feeling so accomplished once I decided on the midwives and on having a home birth ... but now there are MILLIONS of other things to do and to buy.